Thanksday (a thomas-ism)

Well, Happy Thanksday bloggerland.

All is good here in Virginia since I last updated.
We celebrated Brian's birthday. Happy Birthday Bri!
And then my sister and I went on the most amazing trip to NYC.
We went to the RBK Gala at the Palace Theater and I met up with
some of my Ro-friends who were also attending.
The entire trip was out of this world.
The performances were fantastic
and everything you would want out of a Broadway show.
We met all the RBK people who are caring and impressive.
The RBK kids were so talented and adorable.
Queen Latifa was stunning and our good friend Luisa
got to meet her IDOL Chita Rivera.
I pointed her out to Lu and she literally BURST into tears.
And we forced her to go introduce herself
and she did and Chita was wonderful to her.
A very memorable moment for all of us.



My sister's generosity stunned me.
She has a huge heart full of giving and love
and I am so lucky to have her in my life.



And Katie and I stayed at an amazing hotel
and we got a sweet upgrade with a terrific view of Times Square.
IT
WAS
A ONCE
in a LIFETIME moment for me.



As a lover of NYC it was...
unspeakably perfect.
I literally couldn't sleep.
We stayed there for two nights and I would
wake up almost every hour and sit in the window sill
the lights from the city were so bright they lit up the living room
I stayed up almost all night looking down
at the city I fell in love with when I was that 12 year old little girl
when all dreams seemed possible,
any wish could come true,
and in standing room only seats
I saw Broadway for the first time.
From that day on I would never be the same
because my heart stayed there.
Which makes it hard to leave.
Leaving is hard
for me.
I get excited for these trips
and when they are over I definitely feel the fall afterwards.

NYC,
she will always have my heart.
But its hard when you want something
and you can't have it
and when you see it
you remember why you fell in love with it
and then you have to say goodbye
only to do it all over again
the next time.
but, NYC, "Something always brings me back to you
it never takes too long..."
So, I'm sure I'll be back.

Halloween, vistors and Rosie Radio

So, its been a great few weeks.
We were lucky enough to have Brian's parents come visit
and Linda came loaded with gifts and treats for the kids
our 3 pumpkins turned into 6 and
we went to football games all weekend and we had an all around great time!



Then we all got the FLU!
And man did I ever get it.
If you get this flu pretty much cross off 7 days on your calendar.
Because you'll be busy feeling like crap for that week.

Halloween was fantastic.
I had no expectations because in the past Halloween has seemed rushed and overwhelming.
But this year was different,
It was full of friends and fun and I seriously had the best time ever.


And ROSIE RADIO premiered yesterday!
HALLELUJAH!
I was so excited I couldn't sit still so I moved
half the furniture out of the family room and kitchen
and cleaned the floors while I listened.
That way I could work out some of my excitement
and get something done around here at the same time.
I thought the first show was fun and light and is going to be totally fab.
It was personal and funny and intimate and just what I love about her.
Yay for Rosie fans out there!



My Dad and step-mom are coming this weekend
for football playoffs
and then my Mom and Michael
and then my sister will be making a visit
and then it will be Thanksgiving.
I'm loving November.
xo

My current favorite songs...

Ingrid Michaelson 'Maybe'

Snow Patrol Just Say Yes

Owl City Fireflies

Jay Sean Down

Adam Lambert Time For Miracles

Leona Lewis Happy

If you're looking for some good tunes, these are my faves right now.

Where The Wild Things Are

It had me at Hello.
I have been waiting (not so patiently) for this movie to come out for months.
First I saw the trailer and I fell in love with that
and then I knew I had to see it.
Plus, the icing on the cake is
one of the main Things is KW. :)

And I'm so happy I did.
The movie takes you on a journey with Max who is dealing with his parent's recent divorce.
His mom seems busy, sad and just overwhelmed with life.
And you can tell Max just wants to make her feel better
but at the same time is hurting too.
When she brings home a date, he totally acts out
and escapes to his land of wild things where he is king
and HE gets to call all the shots
unlike in his real life.

I found myself analyzing the symbolism in this movie the entire time.
I thought each monster perhaps represented a piece of Max
and even the many pieces of ourselves of our own childhoods.
the baby still inside him that just wants to be held and taken care of
the part of him that likes to smash stuff and wrestle
the sensitive side of him
the story-teller in him (and by "story-teller" I mean lies and exaggeration)
the loneliness he often feels
the part of him that is just craving attention from his mom, his absent dad and from his older sister
I could go on and on.

It was often sad to watch.
It reminded me of my parent's divorce and how that turns a child's world upside down
It reminded me of my own boys, especially my 10 year old, and how he has had to deal with his own grown up stuff in his short 10 years.
I felt sad for the mom, the actress played her perfectly.
The movie was dark, scary at times, funny, and moved me to tears.
And I think it is a very good and very real representation of what it is to be a boy.
Something I never knew anything about until I had three myself.
There is a scene where in order to fix the unrest in the group of wild things Max decides the best thing to do would be to have a war and wrestle
because that is how a boy would do it, right?

My boys are 4, 6 and 10 and I can see all of them in this movie.
They are sometimes messy, and ragefull, and creative, and angry, and sensitive and sweet -
just like the wild things in the movie.

All in all I loved it.
The scenes were beautifully done and the wild things costumes were amazing.
Personally I would not recommend it for young kids if they scare easily
because there are some scary parts.
But Ben and I saw it and we had some great conversations afterwards talking about the symbolism in the movie.
So... both Kelly and Ben give it two thumbs up.
Go see it if you can.

A KW scene that made Ben and I laugh...

Love Loss and What I Wore

Last week I went to see Love, Loss and What I Wore at the Westside Theater in New York City. It is a collection of monologues read by 5 actresses written by Nora and Delia Ephron. I was lucky enough to see the iconic Tyne Daly, the hilarious Samantha Bee, the talented Katie Finneran, the ultra cool Natasha Lyonne and the beloved Rosie O'Donnell. I loved the play. It was the perfect performance to see with your girlfriends - all about the clothes we wear and the significant events in our lives that we wear them to. It made me laugh and cry and then cry from laughing so hard. It inspired me to look at my own life and to write about one of the most significant dresses that I have ever worn during one of the most life changing events of my life. I hope everyone writes their own "Love Loss and What I Wore" story too. If you do, let me know. I would love to read yours.

GO SEE IT: http://www.lovelossonstage.com/

xo
Kelly

Love Loss and What I Wore
That (perfect) little black dress
By Kelly Weist

Everyone needs one. That’s what you hear on all the fashion shows all the time. YOU HAVE TO HAVE the perfect little black dress in your closet that would be perfect for every occasion. You will look perfect. It will be perfect. It IS the perfect little black dress. Only hang up was, I didn’t have one and I had a very important Broadway show I was about to attend.

You see, I love Rosie O’Donnell. I love her. I’ve loved her since her “Rosie O’Donnell Show” days. She spoke to me. She spoke for me. She talked about the things that I cared about. She was the first one I found on T.V. that bravely stood up against the gun lobby, against prejudice and for the rights of children. She was speaking for me when I couldn’t. I vowed I would love her forever, I would defend her forever and I have. When the media bashes her for her views, the ones I quietly agree with but never had the balls to stand up and speak about at parties, I loudly defend her – to my neighbors, on my blog, to my friends – to anyone that will listen.

In following her career and falling even deeper in adoration for her through her blog and her writings I went on a mission for her to know me. “Rosie is going to know me.” I would say it outloud in the mirror. I was determined to make a positive impact on her life as she had mine but hopefully in a classy, non-stalkerish way and not a scary “Rosie has to get a restraining order against you” kinda way. A fine line for sure. Show gratitude but do not scare the celebrity – note to self. When I began my mission to meet her I met a group of like-minded folks who also loved her the way I did. Through a few meetings, some group fan mail and some fan related projects I came to know her assistant. I let her assistant know we were all planning on attending her Broadway show and I boldly asked her assistant, on behalf of my group, if Rosie would mind meeting with us backstage after the show for a special meet and greet. To my delight Rosie said yes. It was set. I was the hero of the Rosie bloggers and at the same time I was going to have the opportunity to see Rosie myself. So, it was no wonder that I then needed the perfect little black dress to do it in. I was Broadway bound and having been around the theater all my life I needed a dress and it had to be black. It didn’t matter if it was one piece, a two piece suit, cotton, velour, silk, denim, just wear black to the theater and you’re in – you belong.

Two nights before I was planning to leave I packed my bags and my little black dress hung beautifully in its clear dry cleaning wrapper at the end of the row of clothes in my closet. I was ready. The next morning everything changed. At 7am I woke to a screaming/crying sister on the phone. “KELLY, COME HOME! I’M AT THE HOSPITAL! SOMETHING IS WRONG WITH STEPHANIE!” I could barely understand her she was screaming hysterically into the phone. My 7 year old niece had been hospitalized for a low platelet count 2 days before and she was in the best hospital on the planet receiving treatment. What she had was of concern but was most certainly not life threatening. However, as it turned out that morning my sister awoke to an unconscious daughter lying in her own blood and urine soaked sheets. My sister was shoved out of the room, as Stephie was rushed into brain surgery. She told me she’d call me back and hung up. I sat in stunned silence.

Somehow I got my 3 boys up and rushed them off to school that morning trying to maintain my composure in front of them. I made several phonecalls. One to my husband at work telling him to come home, one to my friend who I was supposed to meet in NYC the next day and one to my neighbor to ask her to get the kids off the bus for me. I went into my closet took my already packed bag of clothes for NYC and dumped it out on the ground and began refilling it with sweats, t-shirts and jeans. I had no idea what I was packing for I just knew I was heading home to Cleveland for a while to probably spend time in the hospital and I needed comfortable clothes. And there it was. My perfect little black theater dress. For a second, it crossed my mind and I remember thinking “I’m not going to need that dress in Cleveland, right? No way. I mean, what am I thinking? She’ll be fine. She’ll have a long recovery from brain surgery, but she’ll be fine. There won’t be a funeral” I remember being mad at myself for even thinking it.

I left the dress.

Six hours later, when I got to the hospital my father and stepfather met me at the doors to let me know Steph had died. She was brain dead and most assuredly was never going to wake up. Her body died the next day. I called my husband and told him where my perfect little black dress was hanging, along with where my black high heels were and where to find the appropriate undergarments. If you’ve never led your husband through your drawers and closet to explain these things, its like speaking to a foreigner. He did a great job though and showed up with them the next day.

The day of the funeral I remember standing in front of the mirror wondering what just happened to my life. I went from theater tickets, travel arrangements and celebrity fan club discussions to pallbearers, pink corsages and tiny suits and ties for my boys.

The dress still hangs in my closet in the same drycleaning wrapper it was brought to Cleveland in. The dress that I purchased never knowing what purpose it would actually have in my life.

The perfect little black dress
that every woman should have
for every occasion
that I will never wear again.

UPDATE:
Elaine's LL&WIW story

Celebration!

Birthday Gift from Tee Tee

My sister and Doug sent Danny and Ben a joint birthday present.
Here's a video of them opening it.
I am so annoying in this video
try to ignore me.

dream

My 2009 SAHM Survival Equipment

Step 1: Order Sirius.
Step 2: Schedule at least one hour (preferably 2) of free time between 10am and 12pm M-F starting in October.
Step 3: Sit down and learn, laugh, cry, connect and listen to grown up conversation that doesn't include the rantings of some random republican ex-survivor star or an elderly woman who should have been retired a long time ago.

Rosie hits the airwaves on 10-05-09

WILL YOU BE READY?

I cut that hair -finally.

I gave Thomas a haircut.
Why me you ask?
I am not a hair stylist.
Just another one of my many talents?
Um no.
Thomas has sensory issues
to put it mildly.
Food has to be a certain texture
temperature
cut up, bite sized pieces only.
Clothes have to be a certain fabric
Liquids can't be too cold or too hot
And yet he loves water, bubbles, getting wet
jumping, wrestling
but he won't get his hands dirty
that means no playdough, markers, dirt.
He is a constant contradiction and
a real pain in the butt sometimes.
Yet, I can see,
the world is most times an overwhelming place for him.

And GOD FORBID you touch his hair.
Don't touch it
brush it
or good heavens CUT it.
He freaks.
We have been turned down by many hair salons.
He will however (sort of) allow me to do it
although he puts up quite a fuss
I can usually talk him through it
and even though he's screaming
he will now sit still for it (sorta).
So we do it in the bath
I cut and then he screams and then pours a cup of water over his head
cut, scream, pour, repeat.

Only 13 days until school starts
but who's counting?

Summer in Review

So, okay. I've been a bad blogger.
I haven't been much into blogging at all this year.
I think it was over-exposure.
I used to find I needed to share almost everything
and I have learned meaning in keeping some things for myself
there is meaning and value in knowing what to share
and what to hold on to.

This summer has been good
in June we went to Oak Island, NC and had a blast
laying, fishing, playing, swimming.

My sister's generosity with me has overwhelmed me
to the point where I'm having trouble even
finding the words to thank her.
Michael, my mom, my dad and stepmom have also been a huge help to me this summer - they are always there for me.
We went to a very fun wedding with the Weist family too.
I am lucky to have my family
even if I feel very far away from them sometimes.

I snuck in a trip to NYC
a must for me
it keeps me going
also a trip to Atlantic City,
and a trip to DC,
all to visit friends
who I couldn't breathe without,
and to follow through on some life goals.
I feel such a sense of urgency with life now.
She taught me to make it happen
do not wait for whatever your dreams are
to happen to you.

Summer is ending
Honestly, I'm not very sad about that
my kids are bored
BORED.
And I need to get back to
the gym
writing
photography
something...

I have to find something to fix this
this lull in the moment
Am I the only one that feels that?
the downtime depresses me
where my biggest decision of the day is
which Dora episode to put on
and what we're having for dinner
Seriously?
life as a SAHM can get to me
it makes me doubt myself
makes me think too much
I am better when I am busy
I don't have the time to think
about the big stuff
if he will catch up
if life is going to be as it should someday
if the dreams help you or
end up hurting you in the end.

Summer is ending
always hoping
always dreaming
in color
black and white is not my friend
trying to be patient
with myself.
I need a hobby,
seriously.

The race

Sunday was the race for Team Stephanie!
We got up at 5am and traveled to Cleveland
from the burbs
and it was freezing!
Literally.

I was totally nervous before the race
about finishing
about accomplishing
what I had been telling everyone
and myself
what I could do
run 6.2 miles,
running the entire way.

I met all my friends at the cathedral steps
that ironically I took a picture of the night before
and we all met, hugged,
and Elaine (my friend from Boston)
who I couldn't have done it without
and I made out way closer to the front with the runners.
And we began.

It is so amazing to run with a sea of people like that
You can feel the momentum of the group
the excitement
it pushes you
and before I knew it we had ran 2 miles without even trying
then we hit our stride
towards the end we hit a pretty steady uphill climb
and I didn't think I could make it
but Elaine wouldn't let me walk
and we persevered and we finished in 1 hour and 7 minutes
under 11 minute miles.
When you're a runner
(which apparently I am)
your time becomes important.
It just matters.
It shows your progress.

This race is one of the greatest accomplishments of my life
to set this goal and reach it
every day I trained for it I thought of Stephanie
every day.
I would put my ipod on and whisper
"For Stephie."
And during the race I thought of her.
I ran for her
because she can't
because she never will
and I can
and how dare I take one day for granted
take one experience for granted
take one breath for granted.

I am so thankful for this body
that I have
yes, the one I hated for so many years.
Because look what it allowed me to do.
What it ALLOWS me to do.
I will treat is thankfully
and gratefully for the rest of my life.
I am grateful for walking this Earth
for feeling the cold
for breathing the air
for selfless friends.
So many people gave time out of their weekends
their lives
for Stephanie
for my family.
And I am grateful for everyone of them.

A video is coming with the pictures
so many pictures.
But here are a few...

My sister and I


Team Stephanie


And me finishing with great excitement!


I'm going to write a blog about my friends
the ones I have met through Rosie
the ones that came for the race
the ones that could make it.
I can't seem to put into words how I feel
I am so touched and so grateful
more on that later...

A sad video for a sad day

I made this video months ago.
It is just how I cope.
I was in a very, very sad place when I made it
it is the saddest thing I have ever done
to watch the videos of Steph after we lost her.
At the time I needed to express the sadness of it all
the tragedy of it all.
Some people write,
some paint,
I do videos.
Its cathartic for me.

We are doing better now
as a family
then we were when I made this video.
But today is a day to remember
Stephanie
and this video seemed the only appropriate way
to mark the anniversary.

There were hundreds of pictures
from the weekend she died
I notice now that many
of the pictures I selected for both videos
are the same
they obviously made the greatest impact on me.

Next week will be a week of positivity
and coming together
as we race for Stephanie
as we race for ITP
as we race for life
but today
We remember her.

Friday will be one year...

Yeah, Life Is Beautiful

Life Is Beautiful